tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8692381608294018617.post5524723572271735890..comments2023-11-05T07:27:43.837-05:00Comments on Narrative and Technology: Blog 2: Prompt 2Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16302919444091859459noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8692381608294018617.post-18560746005165401772013-09-14T17:49:47.209-04:002013-09-14T17:49:47.209-04:00Your focus on the monster's isolation and the ...Your focus on the monster's isolation and the process by which he comes to understand and even obsess about it is good. The paragraph arguably should be two paragraphs, with the introductory paragraph clarifying what your ultimate argument is, and the second paragraph beginning to accumulate evidence for that point. This is a promising start, but its own rhetoric, because of the questionable structure, isn't quite as effective as it could be.<br /><br />Generally your use of the text, and your explanation of how things change through the course of it is effective. However, your argument about the monster's argument isn't quite clear to me. Are you arguing that his argument changes in tone, or in substance, or that effectively he abandons his argument? You do effectively show that the monster shifts from being concerned (my terms, not yours, but I think you'd agree) with *rights* to being concerned with force, or power. This is good up to a point, but ideally I'd like to see (and in a revision I'd need to see) what you ultimately think it means that the monster has made this shift.<br /><br />Example: you might argue that monster's shift is much like the shift that we might see within political movements (e.g., the French Revolution) as they turn toward violence. Or you might argue that it's related to Victor or Walton's understanding of nature. Or maybe you'd argue something completely different. What I'd want to see, in any case, isn't just an observation about what changes in the monster's rhetoric and attitude, but what that change means.Adamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16302919444091859459noreply@blogger.com