tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8692381608294018617.post6081575921739753073..comments2023-11-05T07:27:43.837-05:00Comments on Narrative and Technology: Seeing the World Behind the WordsAdamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16302919444091859459noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8692381608294018617.post-81417392996706833322014-01-31T21:19:13.930-05:002014-01-31T21:19:13.930-05:00I don't understand the first couple paragraphs...I don't understand the first couple paragraphs very well. I understand that you wan to say something about the senses and how they operate (or what they mean?) in these two works, but I can't follow it. I particularly can't follow the idea that Case has lost control of his nervous system (he hasn't - he's had it subtly but effectively damaged).<br /><br />The third paragraph still doesn't have a terribly clear argument, but it does have a clear idea. You are trying to get specifically at the impact of limiting sensory input - the lack of sensation (in all senses) becomes a kind of sensation. I'm ok with this as a starting point, but we're three paragraphs in and still essentially in an introduction. This is a workable introduction about (my terminology coming) how alienation & identification work in video games - but it doesn't offer a specific analysis of the works in question.<br /><br />Then you have a conclusion, although you never really formulated an argument.<br /><br />Overall: You have some ideas which are worth developing, but you needed to be able to say something specific about the book and the text - here we have a set of incomplete and undeveloped generalizations. The devil is always in the details - you can't evade dealing with the specifics of your texts.Adamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16302919444091859459noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8692381608294018617.post-25850619213322097712014-01-31T01:34:23.513-05:002014-01-31T01:34:23.513-05:00Kurt,
Your essay reminds me of some of the ideas ...Kurt,<br /><br />Your essay reminds me of some of the ideas I explored in my own blog post. I like that you connect the game and the novel with the lack of ability to use all of our senses. However, you only begin to explore this in the last paragraph. The bulk of your essay is summarizing Zork and Neuromancer. If you choose to revise this essay, you could further explore how the lack of ability to use all of our senses gives us a different experience when playing Zork or reading Neuromancer. You mention how playing GTA is a different experience from playing Zork. How does this then relate to the experience of reading Neuromancer? Also, how do the similarities between the game and the novel help us better understand each of them? You don't really address this, which was a large part of the prompt. You could also expand on the significance of the nervous system and perhaps connect the "out of body experience" Case loves so much to the experience of playing Zork. I think you have some really great ideas about the uniqueness of playing/reading these narratives, but you need to expand on their relation to one another in order to address the questions in the prompt.<br /><br />BeccaBecca Gargeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06819700490064030948noreply@blogger.com